Saturday, April 4, 2009

Upperclass America Takes It's Love of Fleece Too Far.

Fleece... the first choice in outerwear by upper-class white people. Behold the Peekaru, the fleece to keep baby warm on those long treks to your BMW X5.

Because what do upper-class people like to do more than anything else? Flaunt their spawn and ability to find love with their homogenous-looking spouses in front of the general population, getting as close as possible to carrying a banner that says "WE FUCK!!", without actually having the banner. Because apparently that would be tackier than the "Smitten", mittens for lovers.

I know it's difficult, choosing between your love of fleece and love for your spouse... but now you don't have to. You can shamelessly flaunt both with sweaty palm hand-holding in the tandem mitten: "My nose itches!" "Awwww I'll scratch it for you, poopsie!!" *HORF*

Where can one pick up the Smitten? Restoration Hardware, where apparently it was so popular that they are currently sold out.

Thanks to Sis in Law for the Peekaru tip, and I'll do you one better:

Photoshops courtesy of Emptees, via Geekologie. Natch.


cat-fish said...

hmmm, maybe this would be acceptable for the armless. This signifies ultimate laziness to me - carry your damn baby people! long gone are the days of Native Americans (sadly), when you needed your arms to toil the fields and cook dinner for your tribe (hence the papoose)...I guess if you are carrying too many shopping bags from Restoration Hardware, you might need this...or one of your hands is tied up in those least there's a hole so your baby can breathe...

Mark Trueblood said...

It's not a product, it's a prophecy. In the future, women will indeed give birth from their bosoms.