I Am Clearly Not Taking The Art of Embroidery To Its Full Potential.

This is a series of embroidered handkerchiefs based on Craigslist Ads. I am posting them for obvious reasons.

See the rest of the series, plus some other examples here. Added extra special bonus kerchief... Marzipan reference. Holler! (I'm still totally right. Fondant covers cakes, Marzipan makes the little decorations.)

Why Not?

These aren't photoshopped. I can't decide if I would rather they were, or to know that the stylist spent FOUR HOURS of his life on each horse.

According to the Daily Mail, it's all advertising photographer Julian Wolkenstein's fault:

Julian hit on the idea of experimenting with horses' hair during a chat with a fellow advertising pal.
'The idea for these images came from a discussion with a friend who said, 'Hey wouldn't it be fun to shoot horses with big hair?',' says Sydney-born Julian, 36.
'It is important to do personal projects just for fun, not to sell anything, but just to remind you why you make images, but mostly, and simply, to make you smile.'

I'm hoping there's more than three... humor comes in numbers here.

Taking the Metaphors Too Far: Questionable Razor Ads

Ummm...

mmm...Creamy: When Frat Rats Work Food Service.

Free Gallon of (Salad) Dressing (Lincoln Park)

Reply to: mailto:sale-mqwqb-1111553909@craigslist.org?subject=Free%20Gallon%20of%20(Salad)%20Dressing%20(Lincoln%20Park) [Errors when replying to ads?]Date: 2009-04-07, 1:53PM CDT

(1) Unopened Classic Sysco brand Liberty Creamy Caesar dressing.

This is a one gallon jar that was mis-ordered at my work. I brought it home by my roomates told me that we already have enough Creamy Dressing in our fridges.

I would hate to see all this Creamy Dressing go to waste- Think of all the salads you could toss with it!

Perhaps we could arrange a Creamy Dressing exchange.

Failing that, I am willing to unload all of this Creamy Dressing for free.

Seriously, come get this Creamy Dressing off my hands.

E-mail only please. First come first serve basis.
Location: Lincoln Park
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 1111553909

I especially like the demonstrative photo that the jar is, in fact UNOPENED.

Upperclass America Takes It's Love of Fleece Too Far.

Fleece... the first choice in outerwear by upper-class white people. Behold the Peekaru, the fleece to keep baby warm on those long treks to your BMW X5.

Because what do upper-class people like to do more than anything else? Flaunt their spawn and ability to find love with their homogenous-looking spouses in front of the general population, getting as close as possible to carrying a banner that says "WE FUCK!!", without actually having the banner. Because apparently that would be tackier than the "Smitten", mittens for lovers.

I know it's difficult, choosing between your love of fleece and love for your spouse... but now you don't have to. You can shamelessly flaunt both with sweaty palm hand-holding in the tandem mitten: "My nose itches!" "Awwww I'll scratch it for you, poopsie!!" *HORF*

Where can one pick up the Smitten? Restoration Hardware, where apparently it was so popular that they are currently sold out.

Thanks to Sis in Law for the Peekaru tip, and I'll do you one better:

Photoshops courtesy of Emptees, via Geekologie. Natch.

Proposal FAIL

I am all about the videos this week!! Ah well. Sometimes your brain needs to take a little vacation.

On to the video from NBC New York... this dude prepared a romantic proposal for his girlfriend on the Brooklyn Bridge, with all of their family present for the moment... AND DROPPED THE RING INTO TRAFFIC. She cries. I'm heartless apparently; I'd be the family member laughing at Butterfingers and recording him jump into oncoming traffic to get it.

Spontaneous Sound of Music!!!!

I LOVE THIS SO MUCH I PEED A LITTLE BIT!!!! Sound of Music and spontaneous public dancing? Is this heaven??

Considering I still can't really move without immense amounts of either pain or Vicoden, this was much needed today. I was a cranky bitch yesterday, hence no posting. Plus I am not clever and couldn't think of any good April Fool's jokes. It's tough when the pressure's on.

But this. This!! So glorious. I'm moving to Europe. Those people have a sense of humor.